Holiday Humor: Synthetic Diamond

An Irishman, by the name of O’Malley proposed to his girl on St. Patrick’s Day. He gave her a ring with a synthetic diamond. The excited young lass showed it to her father, a jeweler. He took one look at it and saw it wasn’t real.

The young lass on learning it wasn’t real returned to her future husband…

Holiday Humor: Momisms

In honor of Mother’s Day, here is a little something to make you laugh. These are those little sayings that are passed down from Mother to Child then are magically are said again when that Child becomes a Mother! — A little "birdy" told me! — A little soap & water never killed anybody. — Always wear clean underwear in case you get in an accident. — Am I talking to a brick wall?

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Hillbilly Humor: Drinking and Driving

Weekly Hillbilly Humor: One day, two rednecks named Bubba and Earl were driving down the road, drinking a couple of Budweisers. The passenger, Bubba, said “Lookey thar up ahead Earl, it’s a po-leece roadblock! We’re gonna get busted fer drinkin’ these here beers!!”…

Hillbilly Humor: Southern Dictionary

Weekly Hillbilly Humor: ALL – noun. A petroleum-based lubricant. Usage: “I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck.” — BAHS – noun. A supervisor. Usage: “If you don’t stop reading these Southern words and git back to work, your bahs is gonna far you!” — BAMMER – noun. The State west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayum….

Holiday Humor: Things Not To Say On Your Valentine’s Date

Things Not To Say On Your Valentine’s Date: 1. I really don’t like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired. — 2. People say I remind them of Urkel. — 3. I used to come here all the time with my ex. — 4. I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn’t hurt to consider it.—

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Holiday Humor: 500 Valentine Cards

500 Valentine Cards: A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.—

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Holiday Humor: Lists of Rules for Him & Her

Holiday Humor: Lists of Rules for Him & Her -1. The Female always makes The Rules. 2. The Rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification. 3. No Male can possibly know all The Rules. —- 1. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it’s up put it down. 2. Don’t cut your hair. Ever. 3. Don’t make us guess.

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Holiday Humor: Marriage Is…

Holiday Humor – Marriage Is… – A best man’s speech should be like a mini-skirt: short enough to be interesting, but long enough to cover the bare essentials. — A classified ad which read “Wife Wanted” received hundreds of responses, all from men saying “You can have mine.” — A gentleman is one who never swears at his wife while ladies are present.

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