Holiday Humor: Women vs. Men

Women vs. Men: Some of the more humorous differences between men and women — A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need. — A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

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Holiday Humor: Dictionary of Dating

Dictionary of Dating: Having trouble dating? Perhaps you don’t have a good understanding of how things work. Use this glossary to get a better handle on your love life! — DATING: The process of spending enormous amounts of money, time, and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don’t especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future. — EASY: A term used to describe a woman who has the morals of a man.

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Hillbilly Humor: Moving Cars

Weekly Hillbilly Humor: Ole and Lena were sitting down to their usual cup of morning coffee listening to the weather report coming over the radio. “There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets.”

Holiday Humor: Not A Hallmark Card

The following sentiments will never be found on a Hallmark card: “Looking back over the years that we’ve been together,
I can’t help but wonder:… What was I thinking?” — “I must admit, you brought Religion in my life…. I never believed in Hell until I met you.” —

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Hillbilly Humor: Down Where the Apples Grow

Weekly Hillbilly Humor: This poem was written about Mrs. Huddle’s late Grandfather by his sister, June Macomber.  It is based on an actual event. Today would have been his 91st birthday – I miss you Grandpa Weirdo! — Here is a tale, as old as the hills. It’s full of adventure, comedy and thrills, Its full of pain and full of agony, too…

Hillbilly Humor: Redneck Birth Control

Weekly Hillbilly Humor: After having their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough. The husband went to his doctor (who also treated mules) and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn’t want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem….

Hillbilly Humor: Slanted News

Slanted News: Two boys are playing football in the Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by a Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog’s collar and twists, breaking the dog’s neck.

Hillbilly Humor: Computer Technology

This here is our technology dictionary. Now, if these get to compilated, ya might need to rest yur brain a bit. Maybe drink a beer and watch some NASCAR. BACKUP – What you do when you run across a skunk in the woods. BAR CODE – Them’s the fight’n rules down at the local tavern.

Holiday Humor: 12 Days After Christmas

The first day after Christmas, My true love and I had a fight. And so I chopped the pear tree down. And burnt it, just for spite, Then with a single cartridge, I shot that blasted partridge. My true love, my true love, my true love gave to me.