Posts Tagged ‘Weekly’
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: Dear Child, I am writing this slow because I know that you can’t read fast. We don’t live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home so we moved.
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: Emily Sue passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911 operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. “Where do you live?” asked the operator….
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: 1. Your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month. — 2. He paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles. — 3. You have a shuttle called “Billy Joe Bob”.
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: One day, two rednecks named Bubba and Earl were driving down the road, drinking a couple of Budweisers. The passenger, Bubba, said “Lookey thar up ahead Earl, it’s a po-leece roadblock! We’re gonna get busted fer drinkin’ these here beers!!”…
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: ALL – noun. A petroleum-based lubricant. Usage: “I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck.” — BAHS – noun. A supervisor. Usage: “If you don’t stop reading these Southern words and git back to work, your bahs is gonna far you!” — BAMMER – noun. The State west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayum….
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: An Irishman, a Mexican and a redneck were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, “Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef one more time for lunch, I’m going to jump off this building.”…
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: Ole and Lena were sitting down to their usual cup of morning coffee listening to the weather report coming over the radio. “There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets.”
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: 1. Never take a beer to a job interview. – 2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them. – 3. It’s considered tacky to take a cooler to church….
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: This poem was written about Mrs. Huddle’s late Grandfather by his sister, June Macomber. It is based on an actual event. Today would have been his 91st birthday – I miss you Grandpa Weirdo! — Here is a tale, as old as the hills. It’s full of adventure, comedy and thrills, Its full of pain and full of agony, too…
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: After having their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough. The husband went to his doctor (who also treated mules) and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn’t want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem….
Weekly Hillbilly Humor: Many, many years ago, when I was twenty three, I got married to a widow, who was pretty as could be, This widow had a daughter, Who had hair of red….
Slanted News: Two boys are playing football in the Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by a Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog’s collar and twists, breaking the dog’s neck.