Bumper Stickers – Cars

Huddle Bumper Stickers Welcome to Huddlenet.com's collection of Bumper Stickers.

We a have over 500 witty sayings, funny one-liners and humorous quotes for you to enjoy.

Have Fun & Enjoy, from your giggling friends at Huddlenet.com.

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  1. 0-60 in 15 minutes!
  2. <98% of all Fords are still on the road. The other 2% made it home.
  3. A parking lot is not the place to “think outside the box”!
  4. A real gentleman wouldn’t stare at my stickers.
  5. Answer my prayers, steal this car!
  6. Back off my bumper, it’s a lethal weapon.
  7. Back off! I’m not that kind of car.
  8. Believe in life after death? Mess with my car and you’ll find out.
  9. Brooms get great gas mileage.
  10. Buckle up! It makes it harder for the aliens to suck you from your car.
  11. CAUTION! – Driver just doesn’t give a crap anymore!
  12. CAUTION! – I brake for tailgaters.
  13. CAUTION! – I drive just like you!
  14. CAUTION! – Trigger-happy Klingon on Tactical!
  15. Car Service Motto: If it ain’t broke, we’ll break it!
  16. Cover me! I’m changing lanes.
  17. DO NOT WASH! This car is undergoing a scientific dirt experiment.
  18. Don’t honk! I’m pushing as hard as I can.
  19. Don’t like my driving? Then QUIT watching me.
  20. Drive carefully, we need every taxpayer we can get.
  21. Drive defensively. Buy a tank.
  22. Drive it like you stole it!
  23. Even though this is a stupid bumper sticker, you’re squinting to read it!
  24. Get off my tail or I’ll flick boogers on your windshield!
  25. Get your own bumper sticker and stop staring at mine!
  26. GO AHEAD, HONK If I can hear you, you’re in range!
  27. Hang up and DRIVE!
  28. He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From The Next Exit!
  29. Hey jerk! You are driving a car, not a phone booth!
  30. Hit ’em All! Let the EMT’s sort ’em out.
  31. Honk if you are just a honker.
  32. Honk if You Don’t Exist.
  33. Honk if you hate noise pollution.
  34. Honk if you love peace and quiet!
  35. Honk if you see parts fall off!
  36. Horn busted… Watch for finger.
  37. How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost?
  38. I can’t wash my car…the dirt is the only thing holding it together.
  39. I don’t drink while I drive. That’s what stop signs are for.
  40. I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather…
    Not screaming in terror like his passengers.
  41. I’m looking for the right pedestrian to run over.
  42. I’m not driving fast – Just flying low.
  43. I’m not lost, I’m exploring!
  44. I’m not speeding! I’m qualifying!
  45. I’m only driving this because aliens ate my Volvo.
  46. If everything is coming your way, then you’re in the wrong lane.
  47. If I’m So Slow, How come I’m Ahead of You?
  48. If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A Little Better.
  49. If you can read this, I can break and sue you.
  50. If You Can Read This, I’ve Lost My Trailer.
  51. Is that how they drive on your planet?
  52. If this car were a horse, I’d have to shoot it.
  53. If you don’t like my driving, stay off the sidewalk!
  54. It’s not my fault I’m the only one in the world who knows how to drive correctly.
  55. Keep your Butt in the your car. The earth is not your ashtray.
  56. Lead, Follow or get the hell out of the way!
  57. My Bumper Sticker Is Better Than Your Bumper Sticker!
  58. No radio. Already stolen.
  59. Objects in mirror may have flunked driver education.
  60. Pardon my driving, I’m reloading!
  61. Please don’t honk – Driver may go Postal if awakened!
  62. Prevent death on the road. Drive on the pavement.
  63. Sorry my car’s a piece of crap, my parents didn’t buy it for me.
  64. Speed kills. Drive a Ford and live forever!
  65. This car is designed by a computer, built by a robot, driven by a moron.
  66. This is Chevy country, on a quiet night, you can hear a Ford rust!
  67. This is NOT an abandoned vehicle!
  68. Visualize using your turn signal!
  69. WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition!
  70. Yes this is my truck. No I won’t help you move!
  71. You have to be really secure to be seen in a car like this!
  72. You’re driving a car. It isn’t a telephone booth, a beauty parlor or a restaurant.

[dis]

Stacy

Stacy is the mother of 3, step-mom of 3 and grandparent of 3. She retired as a project manager for a environmental laboratory. In her spare time she volunteers with her daughter's high school band. She has been developing websites for over 15 years, both for herself and others. Cooking, sewing, reading and history are just a few of her passions. Reading about history is a double passion!

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