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December 15, 2011 | Christmas

12 Days of Christmas for the Scrooge in Thee

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Huddlenet Holiday Humor: ChristmasThe first thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me Is …

ONE
Finding a Christmas tree.

TWO
The second thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me is my
[Husband]: Rigging up the lights,
And finding a Christmas tree.

THREE
The third thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[Inebriated man]: Hangovers,
2: Rigging up the lights,
And finding a Christmas tree.

FOUR
The fourth thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[Frustrated man]: Sending Christmas cards,
3: Hangovers,
2: Rigging up the lights,
And finding a Christmas tree.

FIVE
The fifth thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
F i v e m o n t h s of b i l l s,
4: Sending Christmas cards,
3: Hangovers,
2: Rigging up the lights,
Chorus: And finding a Christmas tree.

SIX
The sixth thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[Frustrated wife]: Facing my in-laws,
F i v e m o n t h s of b i l l s,
4: Oh, I hate those Christmas cards,
3: Hangovers,
2: Rigging up these lights,
And finding a Christmas tree.

SEVEN
The seventh thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[Angry man]: The Salvation Army,
6: Facing my in-laws,
F i v e m o n t h s of b i l l s,
4: Sending Christmas cards,
3: Oh, Jeez!
2: I’m trying to rig up these lights!
And finding a Christmas tree.

EIGHT
The eighth thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[Loud kid]: I WANNA TRANSFORMER FOR CHRISTMAS!
7: Charities
6: And what do you mean, “your in-laws”?!?
F i v e m o n t h s of b i l l s,
4: Oh, making out these cards,
3: Edith, get me a beer, huh?
2: What? We have no extension cords?!?
And finding a Christmas tree.

NINE
The ninth thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[Another frustrated man]: No parking spaces,
8: DADDY, I WANT SOME CANDY!!
7: Donations!
6: Facing my in-laws,
F i v e m o n t h s of b i l l s,
4: Writing out those Christmas cards,
3: Hangovers,
2: Now why the hell are they blinking?!?
And finding a Christmas tree.

TEN
The tenth thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[Toy-commercial voice]: “Batteries not included”,
9: No parking spaces,
8: BUY ME SOMETHIN’!!!!
7: Get a job, ya bum!!!
6: (sobbing) Oh, facing my in-laws,
F i v e m o n t h s of b i l l s,
4: Yo, ho! Sending Christmas cards,
3: Oh, Jeez, look at this!
2: One light goes out, they ALL go out!!!
Chorus: And finding a Christmas tree.

ELEVEN
The eleventh thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[TV Critic]: Stale TV specials,
10: “Batteries not included”,
9: No parking spaces,
8: I GOTTA GO TO THE BATHROOM!!!!
7: Charities!!
6: (sobbing) She’s a witch! I hate her!
F i v e m o n t h s of b i l l s,
4: Oh, I don’t even KNOW half these people!
3: Oh, who’s got the toilet paper?
2: Get a flashlight!! I blew a fuse!!!
Chorus: And finding a Christmas tree.

TWELVE
The twelfth thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me:
[A few guys]: Singing Christmas Carols,
11: Stale TV specials,
10: “Batteries not included”,
9: No parking?
8: WAAAAAAH!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
7: Charities!
6: Gotta make ’em dinner!
F i v e m o n t h s of b i l l s,
4: I’m not sending them this year, that’s it!
3: Shut up, you!
2: FINE!! If you’re so smart, YOU RIG UP THE LIGHTS!!!!!
Chorus: And finding a Christmas tree.

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