Holiday Humor: Fruitcake Recipe

Huddlenet Holiday Humor: ChristmasINGREDIENTS
1 C Water
1 C Sugar
4 Large Eggs
3 C Dried Fruit
1 tsp. Baking Soda
1 tsp. Salt
1 C Brown Sugar
Lemon Juice
1 FULL Bottle of your Favorite Whiskey

1. Sample the whiskey to check for quality.

2. Take out a large bowl.

3. Check the whiskey again to be sure that it is of the highest quality. Pour 1 level cup and drink. Repeat.

4. Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1 C of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 tsp. sugar and beat again.

5. Make sure the whiskey is still OK. Cry another cup. Turn off the mixer.

6. Break two geggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the burner.

7. If the fried fruit gets stuck in the beaters, pry it loose with a screwdriver.

8. Sample the whiskey to check for toxisisticity.

9. Next, sift 2 cups of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the whiskey.

10. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one tablespoon of sugar or something…whatever you can find.

11. Grease the oven. Turn on the cake tin to 350 degrees.

12. Don’t forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window.

13. Check the whiskey again. Go to bed. Who the heck likes fruit cake anyway???

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Stacy is the mother of 3, step-mom of 3 and grandparent of 3. She retired as a project manager for a environmental laboratory. In her spare time she volunteers with her daughter's high school band. She has been developing websites for over 15 years, both for herself and others. Cooking, sewing, reading and history are just a few of her passions. Reading about history is a double passion!

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