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December 18, 2011 | Christmas

Holiday Humor: Holiday Dieting Tips

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Huddlenet Holiday Humor: Christmas1 – If no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.

2 – If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, they cancel each other out.

3 – When eating with someone else, calories don’t count if you both eat the same amount.

4 – Foods used for medicinal purposes have no calories. This includes any chocolate used for energy, brandy, Sara Lee Cheesecake (eaten whole), and Haagen-Daz Ice Cream.

5 – Movie-related foods are much lower in calories simply because they are a part of the entertainment experience and not part of one’s personal fuel. This includes Milk Duds, popcorn with butter, Junior Mints, Snickers, and Gummi Bears.

6 – Cookie pieces contain no calories because the process of breakage causes calorie leakage.

7 – If you eat the food off someone else’s plate, it doesn’t count.

8 – If you eat standing up the calories all go to your feet and get walked off.

9 – Food eaten at Christmas parties has no calories, courtesy of Santa.

10 – STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backward.

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